Monday, 23 February 2009

A Happy Marriage

Today is my 35th wedding anniversary. I have taken a week off work and we are spending some extra time together. When I look back over our married life, I don't see plain sailing and all wine and roses. So what keeps a marriage going for 35 years?

When we married, it really was 'until death do you part'. We were committed to making it work. 'For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health.' It seems to me that too many people think that love is like in the movies, and they walk off into the sunset, happy ever after. Life has not been smooth. We have had many hard times, and many times when we have fallen out. But we have found that when all the trappings are taken away, underneath it all we really love each other, and more importantly we believe our love is something worth fighting for.

And sometimes it has been a fight. Sometimes a fight between ourselves, but more often a fight against the world and troubles it brings. We have had unemployment and ill health, and we are now both disabled to some extent. But our relationship has risen above it. Love isn't static. Once you find it, you need to learn and grow all the time. People change as time passes, and your love needs to change along with it.

In our case, having a strong faith that we share has been a major factor. For the past 22 years we have been Christians, and God has blessed us. Through prayer He is a strength to us both. When no one understands how you feel, there is One who does. We pray for each other and we can pray together over our family and our challenges.

I don't apologise for the soppy stuff. The attitude of many today seems to be that couples stay together until it gets rocky, or they fall out. If what you have is real, it's worth fighting for.

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