BLOG TRANSFERRED

This blog has been transferred to Wordpress and, I hope, improved. Please continue to follow me. Just hop over to here.

Thinking Thursday: God's Poem

“For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them” (Ephesians 2:10).

Christians are God’s “workmanship.” The Greek word is poiema, from which we get our word “poem.” It means “a work of art, a masterpiece.” In Christ, you receive God’s grace and become his work of art.

Michelangelo’s paintings and sculptures testify to his creative genius. Shakespeare’s plays make us mindful of the work of a master. Mozart’s music proclaims the inspired talent of an incomparable composer.

Paul is saying, “Look around. Consider the Christians you know. Think about the difference God has made in their lives. Each life points to the creative genius of God. He has taken wrecked, broken, distorted, misguided lives and made them works of art.”

We are God’s workmanship. Poems, communicating his grace, mercy, and love. Paintings, designed to capture on the canvas of daily living the very essence of life.

God's poem? That's what he has in mind for you! 

[The above was posted on 14th July 2009 by Rusty Peterman on his Jesus Apprentice Blog.  As we look back over the last year it would be good to reflect on how God is shaping our lives. Merry Christmas.]

Scribbling Saturday: New Blogs

Now that things are settling down and I will have more time to concentrate, and now that work on publishing my history book is seriously under way, I have decided that it's time to re-do my blogs.

I am going over to Wordpress, which allows blogs to look more like web sites. I will be converting this blog first, and changing it to reflect my current interests, in order to practice with Wordpress before creating a new blog for Alina and copying most of my White Lady blog posts into it. I have to think about exactly what I want to achieve with each blog, and work out what I need to do.

This blog will still be Ann Marie Thinking Out Loud, but won't include any crafts, for example, as my craft work is now my writing. I am going to do more writing about my faith too, but I haven't decided everything yet. My Alina (aka White Lady) blog will be the platform for publicising the book, when it is published, so has to be carefully thought out.

All suggestions will be gratefully received. Watch this space for further developments and news of when the new blogs are launched. I hope you will follow either or both of them.

Thinking Thursday: Surprised by Answered Prayer

Why are we always surprised by answered prayer? Is it because God so rarely does our bidding?

Since my stroke, I have been unable to drive, and I have spent the past few months going through the process of getting my licence back. I had an assessment in August which confirmed that I was medically fit to drive, and have since been having driving lessons in an adapted car.

It proved much harder than I expected to get used to a different way of driving. I got panicky when I lost control for a moment, and sometimes ended up in tears. Friends prayed for me, and I prayed for strength and concentration and calm. On the verge of giving up, it suddenly came together. Thank you Lord.

Today I had my second driving assessment, to determine whether I could successfully control a car and be allowed to have my driving licence back (suitably amended, of course). I was very nervous, and friends prayed for me, and I prayed.

Something I hadn't bargained on was a magnifying of my emotions. A side-effect of the stroke was a condition called 'emotional lability', sometimes rather unflatteringly called 'emotional incontinence'. It is an inability to control emotions, particularly laughter and tears. At first, a small joke would have me laughing so hard I couldn't breathe, and a small kindness would see me sobbing uncontrollably. I have regained a lot of control as I have recovered, but not all.

Today I found my nervousness magnified hugely. Michael prayed for me and left me sobbing. By the time we reached the assessment centre I had to rush to the loo where I had diarrhoea and was sick. Yet when I got in the car, I was suddenly calm, and all went well. Thank you Lord.

Help me Lord, not to be surprised by answered prayer.

Thinking Thursday: Persistence

Those who follow my Scribbling Saturday blog posts or follow me on Facebook will know that I just finished NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month), a challenge to write 50,000 words in one month. I succeeded in writing 39,000 words, which was quite an achievement, and 7,000 up on last year.

The question is whether I am going to take the practice of daily writing and make it a habit in my normal life.

I think of NaNoWriMo as being like a Christian Bible Week or weekend celebration. You suspend some of your normal daily practices and have an intense time of learning and spiritual  experiences. The trouble is, when normal life resumes, the great things from the time out get soon forgotten.

How long do the things from the Sunday sermon stay with you once the week starts?  Will you put things in place in your life so that you can keep on doing the good things, the inspirational things, the things that change your life?

Scribbling Saturday: NaNo Report

Including today, I have five days of NaNoWriMo left, and seventeen thousand words still to write. I have to make the decision: do I abandon everything and write like crazy to try to reach fifty thousand words, or do I live my life and settle for what I can get?

This year has been a difficult one. My historical novel did not go well - I fear it may be irredeemable drivel - and I am not inspired by my scifi novel. I think my creativity just gave up on the first and won't revive for the second. Oh well, that's life. To be fair, it has also coincided with having the decorator in, with mess and noise making concentration difficult, and I am having driving lessons in an adapted car, which has been nerve wracking.

Memo to self:
1. Clear the decks next year so there is little going on to distract me.
2. Plan the novel in much more detail.
3. Define the main chacters in detail so that you really know who they are and what they feel.

Memo to other NaNoWriMos:
Learn from my mistakes!

Thinking Thursday: The World Needs People Who...

The world needs people who cannot be bought;
whose word is their bond;
who put character above wealth;
who possess opinions and a will;
who are larger than their vocations;
who don't hesitate to take chances;
who don't lose their individuality in a crowd;
who will be as honest in small things as they are in great things;
who will make no compromise with wrong;
whose ambitions are not confined to their own selfish desires;
who will not say they do it "because everybody else does it";
who are true to their friends through good report and evil report, in adversity as well as in prosperity;
who do not believe that shrewdness, cunning and hard-heartedness are the best qualities for winning success;
who are not afraid to stand for the truth even when it's unpopular;
who say "no" with emphasis, even though the rest of the world says "yes".

Ted Engstrom

Scribbling Saturday: NaNo Panic

Twelve days into NaNoWriMo, I have written over sixteen thousand words, which is no mean feat. But it has not been easy. I want to offer some words of encouragement to anyone who may be struggling, or who is afraid to try.

I am trying to turn historical fact into historical fiction, and it is much harder than I expected. I didn't realise how much research I would need, and I keep having to stop and look something up. There is so much I can't make up. So my 1700 words a day is taking several hours, and other important things are getting left out. I have reluctantly decided that I have to limit my writing time, because some other things are important.

Does this mean that NaNoWriMo is too hard? No!
Does this mean that I am a failure? No!

NaNoWriMo is a means to an end: it gets you writing, and writing lots. You always end up with more material than before. Material you can re-work, add to, adapt. Material that is not intended to be fit for publishing, but that you can make something out of that is fit for publishing. Last year I didn't make it to 50,000 words, but I ended up with 32,000 words of a novel which I didn't have before.

So, unless a miracle happens, I will not be making it to 50,000 words this year. But I'm still excited about what I will achieve!

Thinking Thursday: A Prayer to Jesus

Lord Jesus, what can we say to someone who has done so much for us? Who has done everything for us that really matters. A man who saves a life is a hero, but you have done so much more. You have saved us from ourselves. You have saved us from the eternal wrath of God. And to do that you had to leave your Father, leave your glory and majesty, and become a man. Praise you, Lord, for such humility.

You lived among us so that we might see God in a way that we could understand. Praise you, Lord, for such clarity. You lived a perfect life that you might represent us before God with no sin to mar the way. And then you went to the cross and took all our sin onto your shoulders. Praise you, Lord, for such sacrifice. How could we ever imagine what that was like? How could we ever thank you enough? Our whole lives would not be enough, but that is all we have. Take our lives, Lord, and use them for your glory.

You did all this for us, and then you rose again, and conquered death itself, and brought us a promise of eternal joy. And now you sit with God the Father, pleading every day for his mercy. Praise you, Lord, for your unceasing love. Help us by your Spirit to submit to your loving guidance, to be transformed into your likeness and become your instruments for good in this world.

Amen.

Scribbling Saturday: NaNo Immersion

It's quarter to eleven on Sunday night, and I see I haven't posted for over a week. I want more followers, but I'm not going to attract them with no posts. The reason is NaNoWriMo. I'm six days in, and a little behind on my word count (900 words behind, actually).

Take my advice: if you're going to take up an intensive writing challenge, you need to clear your diary. This week I have been so busy, by this weekend my writing was like pulling teeth. The week to come is clearer, so I hope I can catch up and get ahead. I have also discovered holes in my plot which have been hard to fill.

Because it is a true story, I have all the facts, but what do you do while you're waiting for the next event to happen? And how do all the characters react to what's going on? I am starting to work it out, but it's hard.

Harder still when you're not concentrating properly. Ever tried writing while watching tv? And the last episode of Downton Abbey. Not recommended. I'll probably look at it tomorrow and find it's a load of rubbish. But this is NaNoWriMo and there's no time to edit!

Thinking Thursday: A Prayer to God

Praise God, all those that belong to him. Apart from the great things he has done, he is worthy to be praised for who he is. He is the only God, the only righteous, faithful, powerful and unbeatable God. To worship anyone else is madness and folly, for he triumphs over all.

And yet, in his infinite mercy, he has done so much for us. He has shaped human history to his designs, yet cares for each one of us and our daily challenges. He has made the whole of creation in all its variety, yet he lays his love on us. He is all mighty, all knowing, yet he tells us to call him Father.

Praise him for his daily love and care towards us, flawed creatures that we are. He made the ultimate sacrifice, sending his Son to live among us and to die a criminal's death, so that we might know him better and be saved from our own folly and rebellion.

Father, open our eyes that we may see and understand your work in the earth, and be a useful part of it. Open our hearts that we may overflow with love to you and to others. Open our mouths that we may stand for you and speak up against injustice and ignorance, especially of you. Change us, Father, into your image.

Amen.

Scribbling Saturday: Alina, the White Lady of Oystermouth

I don't know when I started writing this book, but it was well over two years ago. Even my stroke didn't interrupt it too much, because I had the book written already, and spent time in hospital thinking about it and planning the rewrite. And now it's on the verge of publication.

I have another blog, all about the writing of this book, which you can find here. My first entry was in July 2009, and I stopped updating it when everything ground to a halt. But  I'm going to start it again, because there is going to be plenty to talk about.

As I blogged recently, NaNoWriMo is coming up, and I am going to attempt to turn Alina's story into a novel. I am researching background material and trying to make the characters more rounded. There is no evidence on Alina's character or appearance, so I've got to make it up.

But there are already moves afoot to produce an e-book and self-publish a shorter version. I am getting endorsements from important people, so I am preparing to begin the publicity build-up. All new experiences, so pop over to The White Lady blog to follow and see some of my research.

Thinking Thursday: WGIHE Preaching

The college near where I live is now called Swansea Metropolitan University. A long time ago it was known as West Glamorgan Institute of Higher Education, shortened to WGIHE, and pronounced by its students as 'wiggy.' One day during a free period, some students sat round and decided to think up alternative meanings for WGIHE. It was decided that the best one was 'We Give Indians Happy Experiences', particularly because of the foreign students. To generalise it, you could say 'We Give Individuals Happy Experiences.'

What has this got to do with Christianity? Well, over the years, I came to use that phrase to myself to describe the way that some people preach. When we go to church, ideally we should be informed, challenged and warned, as well as encouraged and uplifted. Sometimes pastors find it easier to only preach the uplifting stuff.

So often I have heard sermons full of anecdotes, with little or no reference to scripture. The aim of the sermon seems to be 'this person had this great experience, and you can have it too.' Anecdotes are great as illustrations to support a sermon based on scripture. Without scripture, they are empty promises. The message that 'God loves you and has a plan for your life', seems to have risen in prominence in recent years. None of this is actually false, but the way it is put over, and the lack of deeper teaching, makes it very unbalanced.

The Christian life is not all about happy experiences. Jesus said, "In this world you will have trouble." (John 16:33). If Christians are not taught how to handle adversity, but expect only good things, it can break their faith when something goes wrong. Jesus goes on to say, "But take heart! I have overcome the world."

There is even greater danger when these messages are preached to non-Christians. Becoming a Christian is not like joining a social club, where we choose to join because we like the people and the activities on offer. God's 'plan' for our lives begins with repentance, and if the bad news of sin is not preached, how will people know they need a saviour?

A favourite scripture used by the 'WGIHE' preachers is Jeremiah 29:11 '"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."' Firstly, this was written to the elders, priests, and other people in exile from Jerusalem (see Jer.29:1), so this verse is not for use among those who do not already belong to God. Secondly, all of God's promises to Israel were dependent on their faithfulness. I have heard this scripture used to lift the hearts of non-Christians and unrepentant Christians, and it is a false hope.

The Christian life has many happy experiences, some of them, perversely, in the midst of trouble. So it is important that we teach the whole gospel, so that we are all fully equipped to deal with life and to serve with faith. "Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ." (Eph.4:15).

Thinking Thursday: Prayer for Healing

Last weekend I attended a celebration, where Christians from many churches in this city joined together to praise and worship God and support one another. During the meeting we prayed for one another, and a lovely man prayed for healing for me from my stroke. He called on a loving God, and claimed the promise that Christ's suffering heals us (Isaiah 53:5). I gave my 'Amen' to the prayer, but I don't entirely agree.

No one likes to see someone suffer, and it is a blessing to be able pray for them. There are indeed promises about healing, but claiming them too readily leads to disappointment. How do we reconcile unanswered prayer with a loving God who would not want unnecessary suffering?

For me, the key word is 'unnecessary'. Through my stroke, God has changed my character and given me many blessings I could not otherwise have had. God uses suffering to break down our defences and get rid of bad characteristics in us. He uses it to test us and build new, good characteristics into us. Who am I to determine that He has finished that work?

Sometimes the work that God does through suffering is not only in the life of the sufferer. There are the carers, the family, others who look on and wonder why. What is God doing in their lives? When we pray for healing, we cannot know the greater plan. We ask God to end the suffering, to heal the hurt. But we must bow to His will and trust Him to know best.

Scribbling Saturday: NaNo Planning

NaNoWriMo time is coming round again. To remind you, that is National Novel Writing Month - participants commit to writing 50,000 words in one month. The month in question is November, and that makes October the month for planning.

The idea is to do all the research and work out each chapter, so that when November comes, you only have to write. The question is, research and plan what? I don't actually have a novel to write. I have a couple of ideas, and I'm working on them both in the hope that something takes off.

I have a science fiction short story that I want to make into a novel, but I'm not sure I have enough plot yet to sustain it. At least, being science fiction, I can make most of it up. The other alternative is to write a historical novel based on my Alina book. But again, the story of her life is not enough to sustain a novel, and although I can make up a lot of it, it does have to be reasonably historically accurate.

So I am doing a lot of reading in the 14th century and desperately looking for some subplots. And in between, I'm looking for subplots in the other novel. I wonder if it counts if you write two 25,000 word novels in a month??? It's still 50,000 words.

Thinking Thursday: The Biggest Question

I am a big Dr Who fan, and have really enjoyed the latest series, which finished last Saturday (1st October). All through this series ran the theme of The Question. [Warning: spoilers!] I thought we had found The Question when the Doctor said, "I just want to know one thing. Why do I have to die?"

It turned out that he had to die because of The Question, so his query wasn't it. But it started me thinking. "Why do I have to die?" is a valid question for all of us. Life seems so unfair. Even more so when loved ones die, or people die young or tragically.

To answer it, we have to tackle the two deaths. There is spiritual death and physical death. Physical death we are all familiar with: when the body dies, through accident, disease, or old age. Jesus said, "I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live." (John 11:25). So death need not be the end, there is a promise of a resurrection and life to come.

It can be confusing then, when we read that Jesus said, referring to himself, "This is the bread that comes down from heaven, so that one may eat of it and not die." (John 6:50). No one lives forever, most people wouldn't want to. Jesus is talking about spiritual death. When we turn away from God, we die spiritually. So turning back to God, brings our spirit back to life.

The story of Adam and Eve shows us what happens when mankind rebels against God. Because of Adam's rebellion, sin and death entered the world. There would have been no hope for us, but God sent his only Son to save us all. Paul said, "For if, because of one man's trespass, death reigned through that one man, much more will those who receive the abundance of grace and the free gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man Jesus Christ." (Romans 5:17).

But what about Dr Who's The Question? The most important question in the universe, since the beginning of time, hidden in plain sight: Dr who? Who is the Doctor is still a mystery. But it is a question we should all ask ourselves. Who am I? Am I still suffering the results of mankind's (and my) rebellion? Or am I free because of Jesus Christ?

"To all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God." (John 1:12). Who am I? I am a child of God. Who are you?

Scribbling Saturday: The End of Some Things, the Start of Others

My blog posting has been a bit erratic lately, but I have some good excuses. I have been busy.

My historical biography, Alina, The White Lady of Oystermouth, has been prepared in shorter form for printing, and will be in the original form as an ebook. I have also got together samples of illustrations ready for discussion with an artist (if we ever find one). So I can finally put it down while my friends from the Historical Association find out about getting it published and search for an artist.

My first sci-fi novel, Flight of the Kestrel 1: Intruders, went off over a week ago to the Mslexia Novel Competition. They only required the first 5,000 words, but the rest had to be ready when (if) asked for. So I have been reading a printed copy to give it a last check - mostly a few typos, thank goodness. I finished that last night, and edited the manuscript today.

I have been putting my short stories up on Critique Circle and getting some marvelous advice, and they have all been re-written (all five of them - I need to write some more).

So suddenly the decks are clear, just in time for NaNoWriMo, which is in November. So I have a month to prepare. The question is - what? I have two further Kestrel novels in draft already, one of which I wrote during NaNoWriMo last year, so I don't want to write another one. People tell me I should write Alina's story as a historical novel, so I am researching that like mad, but I have no idea which way to cover it. Unless inspiration strikes, I won't have anything planned, which will be sad, as I'm really looking forward to it.

Watch this space.

Thinking Thursday: Scripture Encouragement

Since my stroke, there have been certain scriptures which really spoke to me and encouraged me. The first one, which I have shared before, was Philippians 4:7 'And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.' During my stroke, I found I was not scared at all, but rested at peace in God's arms.

To go with that scripture, I later found Psalm 34:4 'I sought the Lord, and he answered; he delivered me from all my fears.' And my recovery prayer was summed up by Hebrews 12:12-13 'Therefore lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be put out of joint but rather be healed.'

Now God has blessed me again through scripture. On our church weekend away we had teaching from Chris Matthews from Linden Christian Fellowship. He shared two things in particular which struck home with me.

He told a moving story about a young boy playing 'chopsticks' on a piano and a master pianist reaching either side of him and playing a beautiful piece woven around the boy's simple tune. He reminded us of the story of the five loaves and two fishes that Jesus used to feed more than five thousand people. God can take our seemingly inadequate skills and make something great with them. This was confirmation to me that I can indeed make a contribution at church, even with my limitations.

The other things he shared that helped me was the scripture Psalm 73:26 'My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion for ever.' My flesh has failed, in that my stroke has left me disabled, and it would be easy for my heart to fail in the face of the obstacles that present themselves. God has been my strength, although I have not thought of it in those terms before.

As I strive to recover and master my walking in particular, I must not get downhearted and must remember that God is the strength of my heart, and I must lean on him and trust him. Isn't God good!

Thinking Thursday: Context

If I told you a story about a family who saw soldiers marching through their town, you wouldn't know how to react to it, or what to expect unless you knew the context. Were they Jews in Poland during World War Two seeing German soldiers invading? Were they a modern family living in Wootton Bassett watching soldiers escorting the body of a dead comrade? Were they a Victorian family watching a parade of soldiers in dress uniform at a formal celebration? So should you feel fear, sadness or pride as I tell the story?


When you read a scripture, how do you know how to respond to it unless you know the context? So many of the criticisms levelled at the Bible, especially by non-believers, are of things that have been taken out of context. So many difficulties that believers have with parts of the Bible are resolved or partly explained by looking at the context.

For example, one that is often used is James 2:17 'In the same way faith, by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.' This is used to 'prove' that you have to do good works in order to get into heaven. The answer is only three verses earlier: James 2:14 'What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him?' It is the quality of his faith which saves him, but that kind of faith shows itself in good works.

Here is another example. 1 Sam.15:2-3 'This is what the Lord Almighty says: "I will punish the Amalekites for what they did to Israel when they waylaid them as they came up from Egypt. Now go, attack the Amalekites and totally destroy everything that belongs to them. Do not spare them; put to death men and women, children and infants, cattle and sheep, camels and donkeys.'''

This is one of those passages used to criticise God as cruel and vindictive. To modern eyes, we are horrified that God would destroy a whole nation. But what did the Amalekites do to incur God's wrath? Deut.25:17-19 'Remember what the Amalekites did to you along the way when you came out of Egypt. When you were weary and worn out, they met you on your journey and cut off all who were lagging behind; they had no fear of God. When the Lord God gives you rest from all the enemies around you in the land he is giving you to possess as an inheritance, you shall blot out the memory of Amalek from under heaven. Do not forget!'


The problems with the Amalekites continued. Judges 6:3-4 'Whenever the Israelites planted their crops, the Midianites, Amalekites and other eastern peoples invaded the country. They camped on the land and ruined the crops all the way to Gaza and did not spare a living thing for Israel, neither sheep nor cattle nor donkeys.' God left the Amalekites a long time, but they did not change in their animosity to Israel. They killed Israelite men, women, children, crops and herds. God's judgement makes more sense in that context.

Sometimes, we have to look a little further in the Bible for the explanation, which is why it pays to spend more time reading the Bible and getting familiar with what it says. There is always an explanation. Sometimes we have to search for it, sometimes it is in the very next verse.

Scribbling Saturday: Kestrel - Final Edit

Well, I've written a fair bit on here about my science fiction novel Flight of the Kestrel 1: Intruders. I have been writing it on and off for some years now. I am just completing the last edit on screen and next week I will be printing it out for the final check before I submit it to the Mslexia Novel Competition.

The competition closes on 30th September, so there isn't much time left. I really can't think of anything else to do with it. I'm all out of creativity. I just hope I don't find any glaring errors in the final read-through.

I'm getting to know my main characters quite well now, and have discovered some unexpected things about them. I hope they are now much more well rounded than the cardboard characters they started out as. There are already two subsequent novels about the Kestrel, but I have put them away until the first one is finished, as I need to know where my characters get to by the end of book one before I can take them onward.

So wish me luck, and here I go!